December 23, 2020

Romans 8:37-39

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.  For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

 

In 2020, I’ve faced a variety of fears, uncertainties, challenges, and spiritual-realm threats. The new therapist position I began in January with much excitement became tenuous, as the high school clients we serve would not be attending for the 2020-2021 academic year. I was allocated to other departments to remain essential. With a chronic health condition and working at a clinic, I worried for my health as the pandemic unfolded. I experienced demonic nightmares for the first time in over a decade. I heard of two more untimely, sudden deaths of friends, non-COVID related, but tragedies upon already-bleak world circumstances.

Also in 2020, I’ve been immeasurably blessed. My “militant self-care skills” kicked in, especially during isolating lockdowns. The nightmares dissipated immediately as I relied on the Holy Spirit and newly honed spiritual warfare skills. Cohorts of dear friends banded tighter together, even virtually. God answered specific prayers in a deeply sweet, charming, and playful ginger kitten. Despite having to primarily work outside my professional role, I was also approved to work in an area I am most passionate about: staff resiliency and wellness.

“God’s love” is not always easy to remember, recognize, or receive.  Especially when all seems bleak and stresses compile beyond my view.  Especially in the midst of anxiety, depression, fatigue, and isolation, when technology/media distractions and temptations are constantly at my fingertips, before my eyes, in my ears. 

“Blessings and curses” alike will always be there, mixed up together, like “life” and “death.”  I sense God’s challenge to me is, am I still willing to draw near to Him in it all?  The good, the bad, the ugly?  Do I know how intricate His love is for me?  How potent His power of overcoming the worst, the beyond-belief, the “unbearable!!” in my life?  Can I enter in to the reality, with Him, in which He has already conquered “all these things,” and therefore . . .  so have I?

 

— Sarah Woolley